Change
With his fingernails sinking into the nape of my neck, and his thighs locking my waist securely, I couldn't escape. I wouldn't dare to. The snipping of the scissors was all I could hear. Strands of hair fell to the ground. Father was very much drunk again, doing what he thought could let him get what he wanted.
"There you are, the boy I ought to have had." Father's every breath smelt of alcohol. With that, he collapsed onto the ground, with the scissors still held tight in his hands. Father had changed me into a boy.
"Come here, my child," Mother said in a weak voice. With my head still hanging low, I inched forward until I could feel my mother's breath on my hairless head. A drop of blood sploshed onto Mother's slippers.
"Oh God! You're bleeding!"Mother cried. I could only wear one ear ring from then on.
"Why is it a girl again?!" Father's cries could be well heard from the whole village. A sister, Ling, came along. Drunk, as usual, Father grabbed Ling by the neck and yanked her on the floor.
"No! Please, I beg of you! Stop! She's just a small girl!" Mother threw herself forward, her fingers clamming Father's ankle.
"A girl indeed! Move away, you useless woman! Or I will not spare you either!" With that, Father took out the same pair of scissors and started snipping off Ling's beautiful and soft hair. Ling was also changed into a boy under the hands of Father's. Only when we changed into boys with our short hair did Father's mood change slightly for the better.
Soon, the village was filled with six girls. The boys would not play with us as they thought we had a disease. The change in "hairstyle" did not bring us closer to the boys but further instead, due to the cuts and bruises.
"Just hold still. Bear with it. It's just another hair cut. Do not struggle and the cuts will be minimal" was all I could say as my third, fourth, all the way to sixth sister suffered the same torture. They, too, were changed.
One evening, Father did not come home. Mother carried on with dinner like Father was present. That very night, there was a knock on the door. A policeman came to tell us about Father's whereabouts. Mother pulled six of us out of the house, emotionlessly.
In front of us lay Father in the half-frozen lake. Needless to say, Father was dead. The tiniest of us went up to Father.
"Father's blue!" she screamed, running back into my arms.
"But we're not," I smiled at her.
With that Mother pulled me aside and whispered into my good ear, "I went to the clinic yesterday and the Doctor said I was carrying a boy finally. When Father heard of that news, he was overjoyed and got himself drunk. He was so drunk that he jumped into the water and instantly killed himself".
I stared at Father's body. How could he be spared just so easily?
My brother had not been born but he had changed the lives of Mother, my five younger sisters, and me. There was no more hair cutting routine.
There was no more Father changing us into boys.
With his fingernails sinking into the nape of my neck, and his thighs locking my waist securely, I couldn't escape. I wouldn't dare to. The snipping of the scissors was all I could hear. Strands of hair fell to the ground. Father was very much drunk again, doing what he thought could let him get what he wanted.
"There you are, the boy I ought to have had." Father's every breath smelt of alcohol. With that, he collapsed onto the ground, with the scissors still held tight in his hands. Father had changed me into a boy.
"Come here, my child," Mother said in a weak voice. With my head still hanging low, I inched forward until I could feel my mother's breath on my hairless head. A drop of blood sploshed onto Mother's slippers.
"Oh God! You're bleeding!"Mother cried. I could only wear one ear ring from then on.
"Why is it a girl again?!" Father's cries could be well heard from the whole village. A sister, Ling, came along. Drunk, as usual, Father grabbed Ling by the neck and yanked her on the floor.
"No! Please, I beg of you! Stop! She's just a small girl!" Mother threw herself forward, her fingers clamming Father's ankle.
"A girl indeed! Move away, you useless woman! Or I will not spare you either!" With that, Father took out the same pair of scissors and started snipping off Ling's beautiful and soft hair. Ling was also changed into a boy under the hands of Father's. Only when we changed into boys with our short hair did Father's mood change slightly for the better.
Soon, the village was filled with six girls. The boys would not play with us as they thought we had a disease. The change in "hairstyle" did not bring us closer to the boys but further instead, due to the cuts and bruises.
"Just hold still. Bear with it. It's just another hair cut. Do not struggle and the cuts will be minimal" was all I could say as my third, fourth, all the way to sixth sister suffered the same torture. They, too, were changed.
One evening, Father did not come home. Mother carried on with dinner like Father was present. That very night, there was a knock on the door. A policeman came to tell us about Father's whereabouts. Mother pulled six of us out of the house, emotionlessly.
In front of us lay Father in the half-frozen lake. Needless to say, Father was dead. The tiniest of us went up to Father.
"Father's blue!" she screamed, running back into my arms.
"But we're not," I smiled at her.
With that Mother pulled me aside and whispered into my good ear, "I went to the clinic yesterday and the Doctor said I was carrying a boy finally. When Father heard of that news, he was overjoyed and got himself drunk. He was so drunk that he jumped into the water and instantly killed himself".
I stared at Father's body. How could he be spared just so easily?
My brother had not been born but he had changed the lives of Mother, my five younger sisters, and me. There was no more hair cutting routine.
There was no more Father changing us into boys.
No comments:
Post a Comment