Sunday 2 July 2006

...Daddy Mummy...

I realised that I miss Mummy and Daddy a lot. I don't want to talk to them online. No, I don't want to. I want to see them in person. I want to hug them, cry in their hands, chase them around the house, pull Daddy's pants, make faces at them, bake cakes with Mummy blah blah blah.



Each time I hear an aeroplane fly above my house, I'd think of flying back home straight and skip my exams just to meet my parents. Ever since I came here to Australia, I had no one to cheer me up the right way when I'm down. I had no one to tell the right jokes to. I had no one's pants to pull. I had no one's food to steal or no one to chase around the house with. I just feel like going home now and not come back to Australia.



I at first wanted to stay in Australia even after university. But no, not now, not anymore. I wanna go back to Singapore for good as soon as possible and spend the rest of my life in Singapore with Daddy and Mummy. I don't care about the pay, I don't care about how good the people here are. I just want Daddy and Mummy.



I don't want to be like Uncle and Aunty. I don't want to go back Singapore feeling weird. I want to go back to Singapore and feel like I've just got home. Like I've just thrown myself into a sea of embrace. Heck the decision about retiring in Australia. I just want to be with my parents after university. I want to be with them all the way. I'd never want to leave them ever again.



I feel so mean, so guilty, so terrible for leaving my parents just for my good. I hate myself for being so selfish. I want to turn back time now but I know it's impossible and is too late. I really pray for the next three years to pass as soon as possible so that I can reunite with Daddy and Mummy again for good.



I love them. I miss them. And I'd NEVER wanna lose them.



signing off~RYNETTA

No comments: