Sunday 8 October 2006

LOST.

It felt good being alone again. I had the chance to think of things I haven't been thinking of for quite some time.



What does Rynetta mean? And what does it mean to me? Nothing. It was...it was fun introducing myself using a new name but to think of it again...it really has no meaning. It WAS easier for the lecturers to remember me but what's the point?



I grew up with De Xin. And I really don't see why I should let others call me by another name just 'cos I like it that way. I was so used to people calling me Rynetta here that when I here my parents and best friends back in Singapore call me "De Xin", my heart melted instantly. It's just a total different feeling.



I also thought about Greatgrandma. Praise the Lord. He heard my prayers. Greatgrandma can even walk on her own now. I'm so proud of her. And I really thank God for it.



I also thought about...trust. Nope, I still can't find myself trusting people. I even find it harder, now, to make new friends. SFAS opened me up a little but I'm back to my normal self again now.



I also thought of the ballet lessons with Mrs Skipp and Miss Chew. I thought of the times I spent with Huan Yuet and Christine. I thought of so many so many things. I even thought about...him. Whether I should persist and continue liking him or give up and not think about relationships for the moment.



To summarize...I feel lost all over again.



signing off~RYNETTA

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